Snack Monsters
*This was a post that I had created last February and for some strange reason or tragedy, never posted. I was probably just waiting to have a cute picture or something to post.... So here it is, and pictureless nonetheless!
So apparently at Katrinas school there are always LOTS of kids who do not have a snack for snack recess. These poor starving, neglected children (because only the GOOD parents provide a snack) swarm like flies around my daughter and her usually lame snack. I mean my kids are the ones with apples and pretzels while everyone else gets spicy Cheetos and HoHo's (which is soooo not fair).
Anyway, I guess the natives can get a little pushy at times leaving my daughter w/only crumbs and feeling hungry. For instance, she holds out the bag to one little girl and says "You can have one." and the girl replies, "No, I want ten!" and ninja swipes a handful. My solution was to send Katrina with 2 snacks, 1 just for sharing. Jays suggested solution was to punch the ninja swiper in the stomach. Since the latter would be considered assault and in todays world get a second grader expelled, we packed the extra snack. On day one I sent a baggie of pretzels that I was informed were quickly devoured. Day 2 I sent an entire package of graham crackers that were also annihalated. At this point I gave up because I realized I couldn't be everyones "good mom", (plus i'm too cheap).
So last week I'm at the Foodmaxx stocking up on apples and pretzels and I see the MONGO bag of individual chip packages on sale. I stood and pondered: I imagined all the times my kids have been shamed because of the lack of things with ingredients no one can pronounce in their lunches, and I scheme to give into the dark side and follow my desires to be "the cool Mom".
(I can just hear their friends now, begging their parents for the opportunity to hang out at OUR house. After all, WE have variety chips!)
So apparently at Katrinas school there are always LOTS of kids who do not have a snack for snack recess. These poor starving, neglected children (because only the GOOD parents provide a snack) swarm like flies around my daughter and her usually lame snack. I mean my kids are the ones with apples and pretzels while everyone else gets spicy Cheetos and HoHo's (which is soooo not fair).
Anyway, I guess the natives can get a little pushy at times leaving my daughter w/only crumbs and feeling hungry. For instance, she holds out the bag to one little girl and says "You can have one." and the girl replies, "No, I want ten!" and ninja swipes a handful. My solution was to send Katrina with 2 snacks, 1 just for sharing. Jays suggested solution was to punch the ninja swiper in the stomach. Since the latter would be considered assault and in todays world get a second grader expelled, we packed the extra snack. On day one I sent a baggie of pretzels that I was informed were quickly devoured. Day 2 I sent an entire package of graham crackers that were also annihalated. At this point I gave up because I realized I couldn't be everyones "good mom", (plus i'm too cheap).
So last week I'm at the Foodmaxx stocking up on apples and pretzels and I see the MONGO bag of individual chip packages on sale. I stood and pondered: I imagined all the times my kids have been shamed because of the lack of things with ingredients no one can pronounce in their lunches, and I scheme to give into the dark side and follow my desires to be "the cool Mom".
(I can just hear their friends now, begging their parents for the opportunity to hang out at OUR house. After all, WE have variety chips!)
posted by Jason at 1:08 PM
3 Comments:
I'm fascinated - what's the outcome, six months on?
Tragically, I did not acquire the title of "the cool mom with variety chips".
However, I think it is really funny how I can't keep the neighbor kids out of my house when I make homemade wheat bread!
I guessing it's moments like these that got you motivated to homeschool.
I'm so scared to send my kids to school coming home crying for one reason or another. Kids get meaner and meaner with every passing year.
I think you're so awesome!
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